Thoughts for the week

“In examining life, we find that suffering has exercised a great influence on us.  Suffering has given us a certain seriousness and depth.  From suffering we draw fundamental lessons about the world in which we are called to live and about ourselves and the meaning of our lives.  Suffering is indeed a laceration, a division of self against self, a conflict and even a rupture of our inner person.  We suffer but do not want to suffer and hence we experience disunity within. “  Louise Hagemen

 

“Victor Frankl states that when we suffer, there is a tension between “what is” and “what ought to be.” So long as the tension prevails we suffer.  This suffering warns us that all is not as it should be.  Louis Hagemen

 

And because we live in a fallen world, there is much that is not “as it should be.”  For each of us this path is different.  Some of us are deadening ourselves to our own suffering or to the suffering of those around us.

I would like to dwell on the statement above by Victor Frankl with the tension created in suffering comparing “what is” and “what ought to be.”  When we as believers open our eyes to the suffering of others around us, we have blinders removed and then see with new eyes.  So often the situations we see become difficult and cause us emotional suffering from seeing “what ought not to be.”  Visiting an orphanage is an example of this tension.  When I visit our sons’ orphanage and see children who should be with families, some who actually should be in their Haitian families, some who should be home with their adoptive families by no.  The tension of this is what often propels us to action.  It propels us to get off our self-centered high horse and do something that matters for those who Jesus identified with.

For me, the waiting in the adoption process has been a suffering, an injuring to my soul.  A desire for “what is” to become “what ought to be”  A longing for our sons to be home, when they are not.  A longing to feed them their favorite Haitian dish, “diri”, a longing to have all of our children become a family, a longing for the end to this three year wait.  I wish I could say each day I have waited well, and suffered well.  But, I have not.  I have found Jesus always there though.  He is always faithful.  He is always true.  He is always and forever on the throne.  He came and was born as a refugee, born in a land not his own.  He came poor.  He came in a way the people did not expect.  I expect Jesus is often coming to us in ways we do not expect.

This past week we were told to expect an email for the end process of bringing our sons home.  So much that we were planning travel dates with the orphanage and actually had flights booked for leaving Thanksgiving day.  We waited Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday with no word.  I was an emotional wreck.  I had been so excited and so happy that the day had finally come, only to have our hopes dashed and now be back in a place where we don’t know what is happening.  We don’t know if the delay is because they will issue a RFE or just a general delay.  I have found great peace in knowing that I am supposed to feel suffering.  The lack of feeling suffering would mean I have not love.  The lack of empathy for those hurting around us should be a sign, a sign of truly not loving.

Christ has called us to two commands that have abolished all others:

  1. To love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength
  2. To love others as yourself

Thank you for your faithful prayers and support,

Love and Blessings,

Michelle

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6 thoughts on “Thoughts for the week

  1. I love the analogy of a rubber band. Where both sides are pulled a part (ie: Everything in the Bible is true vs Not everything true in life is in the Bible) and all of the tension lies in between, right n the middle of that rubber band. It is where all the energy is stored. Without both sides you cannot have energy. Without energy, one cannot go for very long. I know it is hard to live in that tension for so long and I am happy you are finding peace within it. we have been studying the book of James and your words remind me of James 1:9-16, “9 Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position. 10 But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wild flower. 11 For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business.

    12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

    13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

    16 Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. 17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18 He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.”

    Praying for continued peace and a quick end to your suffering!

    xo

  2. God has put your family on my heart often these days. The waiting is always so hard on us! Praying that you will hear very, very soon and that God will guard your heart in the mean time. Sending lots of love your way!!!

  3. I can’t begin to imagine the difficulty of this journey for you and your family. So much love to you guys and the boys that you wait to bring home. Prayers for all of you during these difficult days of continued waiting.

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