Ramblings again

We are 7 months in our countdown!  Two weeks from today we will be in Haiti!  Right now Kaiti is in Haiti with her youth group!  No, she is not near her brothers and the logistics would not allow for her to see them.  But, we are so thankful for this opportunity for her to get to see the home country of her brothers.  We aren’t able to be in contact with her but look forward to a report when she comes home.

Lots of misc. things getting done here in the Schaffner home.  We are getting rid of lots of things and trying to simplify as much as possible.  Ron just set up two big soccer goals in our backyard.  I have been going through tubs of boy clothes, some donated, some left from Josh.  We are now going to start packing for our trip.

The Lord has been teaching me so much lately.  The biggest lesson I have learned is:  “He loves me as I am, not as I should be.”  This is from Brennan Mannings’ book, the Ragamuffin gospel.  There is something so freeing about that fact.  The reality is that Jesus died for us while we were yet sinners.  His love for us is not conditional on what we do or how we perform.  We each have struggles every day. He is with us in these struggles and desires for us to go to Him with these.  When we think we have to be perfect to talk to Him, we will never be able to go to Him!  And it is somehow in this honest evaluation that we can be more honest with ourselves, with others and with Him.  He desires for us to have victory over sin, but in our own strength we cannot.  I have found myself in a place of great dependence in just anticipating some of the hard days that will come when we bring our sons home.  I know that I will need to lean hard on Him and allow others to help.  I know that in my own strength and wisdom I will not be able to have victory.

Continued thanks for all your prayers and support.  It is a privilege to be called on the journey of parenthood.  Each day we are trying to enjoy the bio children God has blessed us with , building bonds through love, memories and discipline in love.  We look forward with joyful anticipation of the day our sons from Haiti can come home.

Below is a picture of some towels I bought and Shirley Harris from Signature Sewing so kindly donated the sewing of our sons’ names.  Also backpacks and lunchboxes that my sister in law, Jenny Stump procured from her friends, Steve and Mindy Cheney.

I was thinking about how our sons go from having nothing that is their own, to towels and backpacks with their names on them, clothes in their drawers, their own bed, pillow, etc.  Becoming a son or daughter means you are loved in a unique and special way.  It means that you are an heir.  While it may take years for them to feel that love, the reality of the love is there.  It seems in the way I live I sometimes forget that I am a child of God, loved as I am, faults and all.  He specially designs His plans for me, just as we prepare for ours sons.  He loves you just as you are, not as you should be.  Praying that thought will marinate in your heart today.

Blessings,

Michelle and familyIMG_20160626_123115IMG_20160626_123118

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4 thoughts on “Ramblings again

  1. Ruby Mae Ostrander says:

    So much excitement here! Time is drawing closer for sure. Exciting to see God blessings pouring out for the boys.

  2. Carla Freeman says:

    I’m so excited for you! I can’t believe how close you are getting. It brought tears to my eyes when wrote about how they will go from having nothing of their own to things with their names sewn on! Our girls have been with us two years and have just now begun to take ownership for granted. It’s such a stark difference from the beginning when they hoarded and fought over every minor possession. Maybe I just want to say…. Just as you’ve waited for the boys to get here and the time will come, so too will the time come when they are just KIDS in a FAMILY and when that happens it’s amazing and powerful. What a blessing this journey is. Please always feel free to reach out if you need something! We certainly have experience with trauma and attachment…. And interracial parenting. Love your updates! Thank you for sharing with everyone!! Your journey is impacting so many!!

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