To so many of you who have followed our story on our blog, but are not on facebook, I will try to give a quick update.
The boys are now fairly fluent in English. We can at least communicate. We continue to work through various issues which arise from being without someone telling them what and when to do it for so many years. Many of our days must be fairly scheduled and routine in order for Ron and I to make it through sanely. Children from hard places also thrive on consistency and routine. It is very comforting to them.
Each week Ella and pile 8 dozen eggs, 8 gallons of milk, 4 loaves of bread, 2 jugs of orange juice, oh, you get the picture! We are going through a LOT of food! Sometimes Ricardo eats more than Josh or Ron, no joke! The children both bio and adopted seem to be adjusting overall to life. Some days are difficult and we try to find ways to get through. Everyone is working hard at school and we will miss the warm days to send everyone out to get their energy out!
We get to celebrate the joyous occasion of our son, Luke, getting married on Saturday. Praying for a great day of weather and celebration and covet your prayers for our travels there and back!
Please continue to pray for Ron for strength for the load he carries at school. I continue to reach out to you for prayers in the emotional arena. I realize how often others may be crying out to be heard in some sort of pain and in our pride we miss their cries. I just finished a book called “Why did Maddie Run?” It is the tragic story of a college freshman who ran track at UPENN. She struggled with the added stress of an IVY league school and the rigors of college sports. She cried out to those around her, yet from her Instagram posts and her twitter feeds you would have thought she had it all. She committed suicide when she felt she could not quit track. I highly recommend the book for parents and especially if you have children going away to school. Through that book I could relate as the addition of the boys, while it has brought great joy, has also brought emotional turmoil for me personally. It is hard some days assessing the needs of so many different people. I think we often don’t share for fear of words of some who would say, “well, you asked for it.” But, I as I reflect, we know we heard our Saviour say to adopt these for boys. I am reminded of the song:
I hear the Savior say,
“Thy strength indeed is small,
Child of weakness, watch and pray,
Find in Me thine all in all.”
In a book I am reading entitled, The Different Drum, Community Making and Peace, he Scott Peck, MD. talks of the amazing blessing that Alcoholics Anonymous has been to so many. He says about it:
“As with victims of natural disaster, AA starts with people in crisis. Men and women come to it in a moment of breaking. They come to it because they realize that they do not “have it all together,” that they are in need, that the can no longer go it alone. Yet it would be a mistake to think of alcoholics as a truly special breed. Because it has become a safe place in which to reveal themselves, all men and women in genuine community sooner or later confess their brokenness. We are all wounded. None of us really has it all together. None of us can really go it all alone. We are all in need, in crisis, although most of us still seek to hide the reality of our brokenness from ourselves and one another. The men and women of AA can no longer hide their alcoholism; they must confess their brokenness. Crisis is a built in condition for the AA community , and in that sense alcoholism may be a blessing. “
I have heard someone say before perhaps if as followers of Jesus, our lives more resembled the community of an AA meeting instead of that of religious Pharisees, perhaps we could start to get somewhere in terms of being real.
Peck goes on further to say:
“But what happens when we behave invulnerably, when we gird ourselves with psychological defenses and pretend that we are cool cats who have got it all together, rugged individualists who seem to be in complete control of our lives? What happens is that other people gird themselves with their psychological defenses and pretend that they too are cool ones who have got it all together, and our human personal relationships becoming nothing more than that of two empty tanks bumping against each other in the night.”
My faith is being tested as it never has been before, so would you please pray for me?
In closing, one of my favorite authors,
Nobody escapes being wounded. We all are wounded people, whether physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. The main question is not “How can we hide our wounds?” so we don’t have to be embarrassed, but “How can we put our woundedness in the service of others?” When our wounds cease to be a source of shame, and become a source of healing, we have become wounded healers.
Thank you to Katie Dorr Photography for the beautiful family pictures!